Someone Made A Deal With The Devil...

Less than a year ago did super gorgeous supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio give birth to her first child. If this isn't some black magic shit right here, then I'm a size zero.

Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Turn Your Everyday Workout Into A Paparazzi Photoshoot:

Post Brought To You By Famewhores, Heidi And Spencer





Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Drew's diet gives new meaning to the phrase "No pain, no gain."

Actress/Producer/Former out-of-control child star, Drew Barrymore, credits her new bangin' body to a little tongue action - and not the kind you think. Remember that tongue ring you begged your mom to let you get when you were 15? Well it turns out it can do it a lot more for you than just make giving a BJ tons 'o' fun.

"They do it and you're like, 'Oh my God, why would I ever think twice about not doing this; this didn't hurt at all.' And then the guy was like, 'What I didn't tell you is that for, like, two weeks, it's just going to be a little uncomfortable. I couldn't eat, couldn't drink for two weeks - great diet in a weird way."

When I got my tongue pierced in high school all that changed was I ended up posing like Gene Simmons in our family portraits for three consecutive three years before my dad threatened to "rip that thing in your mouth out with pliers." Maybe he would have reconsidered if he new it was just a new form of Jenny Craig...


Hugs and (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Quote of the day

"When I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean, I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
- Mariah Carey

Note to Mariah: Please Only Open Your Mouth To Sing


Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,

MJ

The Skinny On Celebrities presents the Fit Awards!

Awards season has come and gone and I don't know about you, but I'm finding myself missing the gorgeous gowns, Mickey Rourke's drunken acceptance speeches (LOKI!!!!), and Angelina Jolie's losing death stare. In honor of this fame-tastic part of the year I thought I'd get in on the action with my very own............ FIT AWARDS!


Best Bum

Jessica Alba


Tightest Tummy

Kate Hudson


Yoga Body Hottie

Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls



Fittest Friends

Lauren and Lo from The Hills

Awesome-est Arms

Mr. Scarlett Johansson himself, Ryan Reynolds

Best Body Comeback

Nicole Richie


Loveliest Legs

Whitney Port from The City

Best Plastic Surgeon

Star Jones



Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,

MJ

We Got To Eat

Belinda Carlisle of the band The Go-Go’s is the latest B-list celebrity to jump on the weight-loss endorsement bandwagon. These days, the “Our Lips Are Sealed” singer will be keeping her lips sealed to all non-Nutrisystem foods.
This might not be the most exciting flaab news of the day, but it does give me an excuse to post this video from The Go-Go’s:



Viva La 80's!

Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,

MJ

Latest Lindsay Scandal: This time Blow-han Loses More Than Her Drivers License

Lindsay Lohan has gone and gotten herself a new nickname. The failed actress formally known as Blohan, was photographed this weekend looking scary skinny while - what else? - shopping with her equally annoying mother and sister (don't even try to pretend you haven't seen the life changing television event that is Living Lohan).

I guess all that eating out she's doing with Samantha Ronson really fills her up because the sometimes singer, most recently dubbed Lezlo, looks like she's one missed-cheeseburger away from heading back to lollipop-head land.



Lindsay's publicist spoke out this morning admitting (aduhhhhhhh) that L.L. has lost some weight, but it is simply due to stress. Funny how when I'm stressed I inhale an entire tub of Nutella in one sitting, but when
a celebutante gets stressed out she always ends up looking like one of those Ethiopian long distance runners.

On that note, I will now officially only refer to Lohan as Bonehan...at least until the cocaine rumors resurface.


Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Quote of the day

"I'm not strictly vegetarian, but meat doesn't play a big part in my diet."
-Katie Holmes








Duh Katie, we all know Tom's man meat is just not your taste. Maybe that would be a matter more familiar for Will Smith to discuss?





Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Just Sayin...

Is there such a thing as being too fit?




Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Suspicious Snack-tivity

Hollywood is getting skinnier and skinnier these days. Paris Hilton & friends appear to be in a constant battle of whose ribcage can poke through their chest more, the girls on the new 90210 spin-off are so thin I'm convinced they will disappear if they turn sideways, and Victoria Beckham could not resemble a bobble-head doll more if she stood on a spring a bounced up and down.

So yeah, celebrities are skinny. This is not news. But what I don’t get is just how they are so slim. Every time I see a picture of Nicole Richie/The Hills girls/Ashley Tisdale, they are sipping on a 350-calorie Starbucks Frapp. And am I the only one who noticed Poppa Spears feeding Britney cheese ‘n’ grits on her MTV documentary? I know girlfriend did not get her signature abs back with a steady died of Southern fried goodness. Even Lindsay Lohan looks as if to have lost some weight, which is strange because I thought she’d be doing a lot more eating out now that she is dating Samantha Ronson…

Now, I’ve never been one for conspiracy theories, but this peculiarity seems to be worth looking into further. More on this special investigation to come soon.


Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

90120 Starlet Deep Throats A Pastry, Somewhere Luke Perry Kicks Himself For Not Signing Up For The Spin-Off

Try to wrap your mouth around this picture!




Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses
MJ

Just because

Matthew McConaughey stretching...



from multiple angles...








Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Heidi's Hills

The hottest body MTV's budget can buy:



Can you smell the desperation?


Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ

Famous Food For Thought

After some intensive research of upstanding publications such as Us Weekly and Star Magazine, I think I’ve figured out how the Trollsens manage to look so fab and how I am going to Flaab myself. I present to you……

THE OLSEN TWIN DIET

Breakfast: (1) Venti coffee from Starbucks. No cream or sugar.

Mid-Morning Exercise Routine: Speed texting on your Blackberry

Lunch: If we’re talking about MKO, these days I believe it consists of a pint of Jack Daniels out of a paper bag.

Dinner: Two bites of the mixed greens salad from the Waverly Inn and 1 – 2 packs of Marlboro UltraLights for dessert.



Hugs & (Hershey) Kisses,
MJ